Today, I wanted to share my personal story while also sharing a combination of pictures that shows my transformational journey from body hatred, food obsession, low self-esteem, wanting to fit in and be accepted by society’s beauty standards.
For more then 10 years I suffered an eating disorder because I wanted to be loved and accepted. I thought that once I have that perfect body, I will find real friends, I will enjoy socializing, I will be more outgoing, I will feel beautiful and will be able to finally do all those things I wanted – going to the beach, quit my job that I hated and start a business. I didn’t dare to ever speak my truth and was trying to please everyone by saying yes and amen – because I didn’t want to offend anyone, I wanted to be polite.
I never had the confidence to be me, to find my voice, to tell my not funny jokes and just have a short top when other people were around me.
When I came to NZ, the switch went on. I felt like with the new location, or to be more precise, a new country on the other side of the world, where nobody knew me, I can finally be me, be real. I remember it like yesterday, before I came to NZ, I made a pact with myself. I will act from a space of authenticity and will finally step out of my comfort zone and actively search what lights me up.
And so yoga, dancing and like minded people came into my life. I was living the dream. I seriously was – I was gaining confidence, I met people who I loved and connected with, on a level like I never experienced before, I said NO when I meant no and said yes when I meant yes. And you know what – I fucking stopped looking for wrong attention from men. I didn’t need that attention to feel good and important. I was important to myself.
And so – as the time went by, the new voice inside me decided to share my story and help other women to stop conforming to the wrong society’s standards, to stop being afraid to speak own truth and be confident just the way we are – because we are just that – fucking beautiful.
It makes me frustrated to see other women to beat themselves up because they don’t have a barbie doll body, hide behind the beautiful pretended perfect pictures, hide at home, starve themselves and obsess over how much food they had to eat and how it is going to make them fat.
And all that to empower women to live their uniquely purposeful life where they love themselves, nourish and nurture their bodies, minds and souls and never diet again.
And you know what – it came from one decision – a decision to change my attitude towards my self and that changed my life. Why am I telling you this?
Because this story could be yours.
One of the most common topics that come up that is holding women back from living their life on their terms is self-hatred and low self-esteem. See, I have been there. I get you. But let me tell you this.
You can change your story like I have changed mine. I could have been still in the same situation as I was 10 years ago.
“The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.”
All it takes is to make a decision to change your life, live and speak your truth, go to the beach and love the heck out of it, go tramping and enjoy that sweat, and enjoy what you love doing – without worrying what other people might think or say. It is your life, so live it.
And you know what?
Start believing in yourself, what you have to say and who you are!
Love yourself just the way you are and express it in a way that is authentic and real to you.
You don’t need to do dancing and yoga to find your passion and gain confidence. But you know what, maybe this is something you could just try. Because why not! By the way, you don’t need to move to the other side of the world either, just from the comfort of your home is fine.
You don’t even need to do it alone. There are so many resources, groups, networks that you could be part of with like minded women who have your back.
Maybe you would like to join some of the resources I have mentioned, so here it is again:
Eat, Love, Live – Women’s support group
Reclaim My Life – women’s group program
a program that is designed to get women from feeling stuck and lost, to getting the results you want – feeling confident, energized, connected, empowered, fit, happy and beautiful.
And by the way – to take this picture and actually post it openly on Social Media was not easy, I still don’t like it, but just to push myself out of my comfort zone, I felt the discomfort and did it anyway. I know that some people will probably think, what do you have to worry about, you look find. Remember, it is not our body, it is our mind that determines how we feel about ourselves and how we see ourselves.
With much Love